ou know what really chaps my ass? How everyone keeps saying, “Welp, summer’s over!” and “I have to enjoy these last days of summer!” and so on. I spent my whole summer being crazily busy and I feel like the warm, happy weather is just starting – so let’s just go ahead and pretend like it’s not almost over. In fact, it’s not. We still have all of September, and October is usually pretty damn nice too. So shut your pie-holes, summer-doomsdayists. I was so fed up about this the other day that I decided to make a salad for breakfast that would give the ol’ middle finger to all those nay-sayers out there who think we need to get our dens ready for hibernating.
It’s ridonkulously simple to make this, and it’ll last at least a week in your fridge (or longer, if you like to live on the wild side) (I don’t) (but Dave does, hence the drawer full of moldy corn I found last week). The best part is, it’s delicious and tastes just like this wonderful season that WILL NEVER END.
- 4 oranges
- 2 pink grapefruits
- Honey or maple syrup to taste
- 2 sprigs of fresh mint, plus more for garnish if you want to impress people
So the hardest part about making this, if you haven’t segmented a citrus fruit before, is…uh…segmenting the citrus fruit. Damn. I hate repetitive sentences.
Lucky for you, if a klutz like me can do it, anyone can. It’s simple:
Step 1: Cut a hole in a box
…haha, have I made that joke before? I’m pretty sure I have. Okay, for serious this time:
Step 1: Using a sharp paring knife, cut the top and bottom off of your orange.
Step 2: Cut off biggish chunks of skin, following the curve of the orange – you’ll probably take it of in fifths or sixths. There will be lines of white between the chunks; cut those off next.
Step 3: Cut the orange in half.
Step 4: Lay the half face-down on your board and cut thin segments from the orange, starting at the bottom and fanning your way up and over.
Step 5: Do it until you have no more oranges and a massive bowl full of peels. Argue with your husband that you can’t think of anything to DO with the peels, so you ARE GOING TO THROW THEM AWAY BECAUSE LOOK AT THE MOLDY CORN IN THE FRIDGE AND DO YOU WANT TO DEAL WITH EVEN MORE DISGUSTINGNESS IN A MONTH AFTER WE REALIZE WE NEVER DID ANYTHING WITH THE EFFING PEELS?!
The illustrated version should be a little easier to follow:
(The above pictures were taken by the hubs – give him a round of applause and overlook the fact that my muffin top was hanging out in the background.)
Annyhooooo, after you’re done segmenting, drizzle everything with honey to taste (depending on how sweet your fruit is) and add the chopped fresh mint. Toss, serve, and bask in the fact that Summer 2010 will live on for eternity.
You could totes make this with whatever fruit is in season. Like plums. Yeah. I think I’ll do that tomorrow.
Oh, p.s., want to see the corn I was talking about? No? Too bad. I want you to know that I will never ever lie to you. Unless you ask me whether I like to pick my nose when I’m reading a good book.