Archive for March 23rd, 2009

March 23, 2009

Anyone heard about this new-fangled “sleep diet”?

I first heard about this on The Girls Next Door (which is a GREAT show to watch if you want to have a healthy body-image…nothing like a bunch of trussed-up bimbos with nothing better to do than perfect their tans and get boob jobs). One of them – I believe it was Kendra Wilkinson – said something along the lines of: “The sleep diet is easy! Every time you feel hungry, just go to sleep for a while, and then when you wake up, you won’t be hungry anymore!” That show is amazing. You can’t make this stuff up.

The only guaranteed way to get me to sleep is to feed me...this is me after my second Thanksgiving dinner this year. Note the double-chin that grew between meals 1 and 2.

A guaranteed way to get me to sleep is to feed me...this is me after my second Thanksgiving dinner this year. Note the double-chin that grew between meals 1 and 2.

So it turns out, though, that the Sleep Diet is actually a real thing, with some convincing-sounding and hard-to-pronounce scientific theory to back it up.

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March 23, 2009

Half-marathon training: Day 21

Wow, I’m so sorry I’ve been in hiding for the past couple of days. The truth is that I, like so many people of late, have succumbed to the Death. My sinuses are clogged, my throat is painfully sore, my temperature is high, and I feel drunk without the benefits of being uninhibited enough to think I’m a good dancer. Thus, here’s how my 3-mile run went this morning.

This is me just over half-way into the run

This is me just over half-way into the run...even that sprightly older gentleman in the background had more energy than me.

Poor Dave tried his hardest to cuddle me into a good mood, but it wasn't taking.

Poor Dave tried his hardest to cuddle me into a good mood, but it wasn't taking.

For posterity, I’ve decided to give you the anatomy of a terrible workout (maybe you’ll learn from my mistake):